Dr. Elisabeth Kubler-Ross, Aunt Willie, and Catherine Winter, PI, Could Easily Be "Superman!"

My Aunt Loretta, age 89

Today I was thinking abut women, women who I have either personally known or who I have admired. Women who have been intelligent, daring, curious, humorous, outspoken, independent, strong, and determined. Women who I consider to be heroes.

The first woman who comes to mind is the late Elisabeth Kubler Ross, M.D. I first saw her on television shortly after her book “On Death and Dying” was published. I admired the way she put her medical career to the test by standing up for what she believed. Years later I had the opportunity to meet her and spend time with her. That was in 1989 not long after she gave my husband Don Pendleton and I an endorsement for our book, “To Dance With Angels.” When Don nearly died from a heart attack and brain hemorrhage in 1991, Elisabeth was there for me by phone to tell me how important it was for me to stay centered and rested as I might be called upon to make a life/death medical decision and no matter what happened to Don, he would be just fine. I was thankful for that advice at a very difficult time. Then in about 1996 or so, I had the opportunity to spend an afternoon with her at her home in Arizona. Just her and I. She’d had a stroke, but we shared time together, laughing, eating chocolates, and me putting food out for her coyotes. I shared with her the impact her grief work had on my life. It was a day I will always remember. She was a hero to me: outspoken, determined, not afraid to write and speak of her spiritual experiences, and dedicated to her work. An impressive and inspiring woman.

Another woman who had that innate determination, humor, intelligence, and curiosity about life was my Aunt Loretta, Willie, as I always called her. She died in 1994 at the age of 97. I’ve written about her before. From horse and buggy to rockets to the moon and beyond–all in one lifetime. She was one of those to have seen all this splendid technology unfold before her very eyes. Don and I spoke with her shortly before her death about her long life and all the changes that had taken place since her days as a little girl in the small coal mining towns of Pennsylvania and Colorado at the turn of the twentieth century. She told us, "Yes, I have seen it all from the beginning–automobiles, jet airplanes, television, man on the moon, those computers–so much–and it has been a good life."

So in one lifetime, and five-generations, the advances of mankind have been tremendous. Her great-great grand-children now have high-speed computers beguiling them into a world of "virtual reality" with both educational and entertainment values, state-of-the-art medical technology available to them if the need arises, satellite television programming, DVR's, digitally recorded music, and the vision that they may one day be taking a pleasure cruise to a destination beyond our planet Earth and into the far reaches of space instead of jetting to Europe for the summer.

Aunt Willie told us that it had been a good life but we know that it was her attitude that made it so because she had endured a lot of suffering and pain in those ninety-seven years. It is hard to say how many of us could have come through it all with such strength, dignity, grace, and humor.

These two women personified the word hero.

I believe it was the inspiration of these two older women, and women like them, that led me to create the personality of my fictional character, Catherine Winter in my Catherine Winter, Private Investigator Series. I believe I modeled her after the likes of Elisabeth and Willie. If you read my "Shattered Lens" and "Fractured Image," let me know if you see those traits in Catherine: daring, curious, intelligent, humorous, outspoken, and determined. In my mind, when I conceived Catherine Winter, I envisioned the determination and strength of a hero. She does not wear a "Superman" costume but a “skin” that bounces off disappointments, failures, and set-backs, and loves to tease and laugh, not only laugh with you, but even at herself.

~Linda

Hillary at Democratic Convention Was Great

Hillary Clinton's speech tonight at the Democratic Convention was excellent. It was also a reminder of how close she may have come to leading this country. Her speech brought up some of the issues I have with what could happen with the outcome of this important election. And some of that has to do with women's rights and how there is a possibility if McCain was to be elected that we would continue to have the Religious Right with their noses right in the middle of our politics and decisions in areas such as the abortion issues and gay rights issues. I do not want to see this country take a giant step backward regarding those issues. When I hear women, maybe younger than myself, not wanting to vote for a Democrat I shudder and wonder what they are thinking with the huge possibility of losing their right to make decisions for themselves in regards to their bodies, or to allow the government to rule over sexuality and choice of marriage partner. Blacks got the right to vote long before women did. Divorce, which is common today, was very difficult to obtain just a very few years ago. Women have been discriminated against since the beginning of time on this planet--culturally, religiously, socially and economically. Our grandmothers and great grandmothers had no rights to even own property. If their husband's died they had to auction everything and buy back their own cows. (Do some genealogy and see how common that was). I clearly recall the alleyway abortions, the trips to Mexico, the clothes hanger abortions, that women in my generation were undergoing at risk of life. And many died from hemorrhage or infections. Whether a woman chooses to have an abortion is between her and her God and not to be judged and interfered with by government, or somebody pounding a pulpit. In those days there were a bunch of men, some very old, that held in their hands legislations controlling those issues, and some of those 'good old boys' wanted the women "barefoot and pregnant." I sometimes wonder if we've gotten very far beyond that attitude.

And then there is the war. Women....come on, how can you stand still while young men and women are giving up their lives for OIL and POWER and GREED, at the whim of our present administration....and strategies and military "strength" that McCain apparently wants to continue with his "heroic" military thinking. Many of us are asking what will happen if we need military here on our own soil? ....we are stretched too thin....bring them home.

And corruption....there has been so much corruption and often it is swept under the carpet--and Congress is to blame for that also.

What does it matter that our gay neighbors decide to marry? I believe the Republicans RR use this issue often as nothing more than diversion from important issues facing this country.

This week is also the anniversary of Katrina. Has that been fixed? No. If it wasn't for CNN and someone reporting like Anderson Cooper (who was there in the middle of it), we'd probably not hear anything about the problems that still exist there in New Orleans and elsewhere.

Our rights have been eroded, and at times almost behind our backs. Those executive orders, the Patriot Act. Why have we put up with it? And our standing in the world. We're hated, and our administration is laughed at. How many years will it take to regain our world position?

Can Obama and Biden change that? All of it? I hope so. At least it can be a start. The pendulum needs to swing and the only way it will swing is a vote for Obama and Biden. McCain, not the man he used to be, especially when he was my Senator a few years back, will keep the pendulum stuck and not moving, or it will continue to be swinging BACKWORD. We can't have that for this great country. We have to get our country back and make things good again. And we have to do it NOW before it is too late.

~ Linda

Excerpt from Hillary Clinton’s Democratic Convention Speech, August 26, 2008.

You know, America is still around after 232 years because we have risen to every challenge in every new time, changing to be faithful to our values of equal opportunity for all and the common good.

And I know what that can mean for every man, woman and child in America. I'm a United States senator because in 1848 a group of courageous women and a few brave men gathered in Seneca Falls, New York, many traveling for days and nights -- (Cheers, applause) -- to participate in the first convention on women's rights in our history.

And so dawned a struggle for the right to vote that would last 72 years, handed down by mother to daughter to granddaughter -- and a few sons and grandsons along the way.

These women and men looked into their daughters' eyes and imagined a fairer and freer world, and found the strength to fight. To rally. To picket. To endure ridicule and harassment, and brave violence and jail.

And after so many decades, 88 years ago on this very day, the 19th amendment giving women the right to vote became enshrined in our Constitution. (Cheers, applause.)

My mother was born before women could vote. My daughter got to vote for her mother for president. This is the story of America, of women and men who defy the odds and never give up.

So how do we give this country back to them? By following the example of a brave New Yorker, a woman who risked her lives to bring slaves to freedom along the Underground Railroad.

On that path to freedom, Harriet Tubman had one piece of advice. If you hear the dogs, keep going; if you see the torches in the woods, keep going; if they're shouting after you, keep going. Don't ever stop; keep going. If you want a taste of freedom, keep going. (Cheers, applause.)

And even in the darkest moments, that is what Americans have done. We have found the faith to keep going. (Cheers, applause.) I have seen it. I have seen it in our teachers and our firefighters, our police officers, our nurses, our small-business owners and our union workers. I've seen it in the men and women of our military.

In America, you always keep going. We're Americans. We're not big on quitting. (Laughter.) And remember, before we can keep going, we've got to get going by electing Barack Obama the next president of the United States. (Cheers, applause.) We don't have a moment to lose or a vote to spare. Nothing less than the fate of our nation and the future of our children hangs in the balance.

I want you to think about your children and grandchildren come Election Day. Think about the choices your parents and grandparents made that had such a big impact on your lives and on the life of our nation. We've got to ensure that the choice we make in this election honors the sacrifices of all who came before us and will fill the lives of our children with possibility and hope. That is our duty: to build that bright future, to teach our children that in America there is no chasm too deep, no barrier too great, no ceiling too high for all who work hard, who keep going, have faith in God and our country and each other. That is our mission, Democrats.

Let's elect Barack Obama and Joe Biden for that future worthy of our great country. (Cheers, applause.)

Instead of "That is our mission, Democrats" she should have said, "That is our mission, Americans.

The Imus Overreaction

What we have experienced this past week has been the all too familiar tactics of what our media has become. The media apparently was done with tearing down Anna Nicole Smith and Howard K. Stern, and jumped at the opportunity to ruin someone else, i.e. Don Imus. Recently I’ve been watching some of Imus’ MSNBC show if I happened to be awake in the wee hours of the morning. I enjoyed all I saw. I liked the up-to-the-minute news, the political interviews, and the singers, etc. I can’t say I’ve ever been a fan of Imus, but I found the show interesting.

His cancellation by MSNBC and then his radio show firing by CBS was uncalled for and an overreaction. Imus’ comment was offensive and I do not condone his words aimed directly at the Rutgers girl’s college basketball team. He never should have said those words, but he did, and took responsibility and apologized. And that should have ended it. But instead Al Sharpton, Jackson, and others, used it as an opportunity to elevate themselves and their agenda. Were those three words worth a man losing his forty year career? No. After all he is considered a shock jock and his show brought in 25 % of the revenue for the radio company, and 20 million plus, and was the fourth rated talk show. So why the panic from advertisers? Obviously advertisers misread the public as polls are showing that about 75% of people feel he should not have been fired, and today a Fox Poll is showing 76% agree another media company should hire Imus to resume his radio show. This firing was about money: fear and panic, not outrage.

I doubt anyone was complaining about the two weeks off as a consequence except those who were determined to make this such a big issue that he would be fired. Imus has always been a little outrageous, so why now when this kind of language has become so prevalent and apparently acceptable by many in our society? Why is it OK for rappers and comedians to use these terms, or other terms directed at Caucasians? Why is there a double standard?–and reverse discrimination happening? I’ve heard repeatedly on TV that 80% of the disgusting rap music is bought by "white youths." If that is correct, which I tend to doubt, then they have to stop giving the music attention, as do the black youth. The music is degrading toward girls and women, borders on porn, violence, drug use, and worse. Some commentators have compared Imus’ comment to that of the actor, Michael Richards. No comparison there at all. Richard’s outburst was done in anger and rage, was extremely malicious, and was definitely intended to be racist. Imus intended his comment to be humorous but of course it was not.

There is a much bigger issue here and reflects the division we have in this country. Al Sharpton and Jesse Jackson are always looking for an opportunity to jump in and, in most cases, make a situation worse, in the name of "racism." While this was happening, three other athletic students from Duke University were cleared of all rape and abuse charges. A year ago, Sharpton and Jackson turned that event into a racial issue and inflamed the community, ready to hang these students out to dry. There have been numerous times when they have inflamed events. It’s time Sharpton, Jackson and other black leaders, use their positions and influence to make positive changes within the black youth culture, and not focus on exaggerated victimhood issues. We all need to come together and make this country a better place, not a place of division based on the color of skin.

And on the same day that CBS fired Imus, Oprah had a brief interview with the young women’s college team on her show, and she follows that up with learning to dance to hi-hop music, and makes a comment that a "white guy" can’t dance. Seems that is as racist as what Imus said. She then followed that up indicating a man in the audience as the "white guy I’m talking about." According to postings on her message board a lot of people were not happy with her comments and called it "reverse racism."

One of the young women on the team said that Imus had taken away her dream. Each of those girls need to know and believe that their accomplishments are theirs to have and honor and all this media circus will not affect their feeling of pride unless they let it. That is where their power is as women.

And sadly, while the meeting of the Rutgers women students and Imus and his wife was happening at the Governors mansion last night, the Governor of New Jersey, Jon Corzine was critically injured in an automobile accident on the way to the meeting. That shouldn’t have happened either.

The old 19th century proverb, "Sticks and stones will break my bones but words [names] can never hurt me," seems to have lost its value in today’s world of mass media.

~ Linda

Women and The Five Letter Word ~ Money

I enjoy the Suze Orman Show on CNBC every Saturday evening. Suze is a financial advisor with a lot of intuition and insight, and I am fascinated how she brings out the psychological-emotional problems in regards to money issues with her guests. I’m interested in the dynamics of money in peoples’ lives and the resolution of money issues through new insights. (Must be the writer in me). Often, the root cause of money problems goes back to childhood and self-esteem issues.

I like Suze’s motto: "People first, then money, then things." What we have to remember about "people first" is that also means ourselves. As women, we are nurturers and that quality is ingrained within us and reinforced by raising a family. So on the totem pole of relationships, a woman usually ends up at the bottom. Everyone else–husbands, children, family, and friends –seem to always come before our own needs and desires.

A courageous and freethinker, Elizabeth Cady Stanton, fighting for equality for women, had this to say more than one hundred fifty years ago: "Woman will always be dependant until she holds a purse of her own." Who holds your purse? Married or not, do you have credit in your own name alone? An individual savings account? Are you building a solid financial future for yourself? Circumstances can change over the years, and too often in unexpected ways.

Nancy mentioned in her earlier post, "Help! I Need Somebody," that she, like many of us women at an older age, find ourselves with financial situations not as richly abundant as we had hoped. First, time goes too fast, and almost before you blink your eyes, you find you are 40-50-60 plus, and collecting Social Security and awaiting Medicare coverage. (Of course, Medicare may be a financial relief from outrageous medical insurance premiums). In those earlier years of raising a family, often living paycheck to paycheck, we did not have 401Ks, IRAs, or the money or motivation to invest in the stock market.

Nancy and I learned to save at a young age. We had savings accounts through school. Seems like we saved a quarter weekly, or maybe it was monthly, but we had our bank savings account books. Ironically, through my genealogical research of our family, I learned that the bank school savings idea was put into place by our distant cousin, banker and best-selling author, Rex Stout (Nero Wolf novels). The Educational Thrift Service came to be just before the 1920s.

Our parents did not believe in credit cards. When Daddy wanted a new car, he saved. I believe they may have once obtained a short term 90-day loan at the bank, but that was very unusual for them. Even to this day, Mama has only charged something once that I recall. She can’t imagine having credit card debt or late payments. She has always paid bills a day or two after she receives them. Nancy and I tease her that she has a fear of being hauled off to jail if she was to have a late payment. LOL.

So what happened to Nancy and me? We got married! And with that, during the 1960s, we probably did little saving, if at all. I know I didn’t. There was always other obligations–such as food, clothes for the kids. You know, the usual obligations of raising a middle-class family in those days and living on "good wages" of about $6,000 a year or less. I was married in 1960 and we rented a small but very nice two bedroom house and the monthly rent was $87.50! Times have really changed, haven’t they? Life was simpler in those days, less chaotic, less fluff, more close-knit family activities.

I plan to buy Suze Orman’s new book, Women and Money. I may not learn anything new but I look forward to reading it. In her book she writes of the Eight Qualities of a Wealthy Woman. Wealthy in self-reliance and the ability to bring abundance, in whatever form, into your life. She lists these qualities as Balance, Harmony, Courage, Generosity, Happiness, Cleanliness, Beauty, and Wisdom. She made some good points about these qualities on her show tonight and she’ll be dealing with them in the coming weeks. If we have balance and harmony–think, say, and do, as one; courage to say no, or to express our real feelings; then it leads to happiness and with the understanding that we don’t spend money on things we don’t need or on others when we may not have it to spend; cleanliness means to remove clutter and put things in order; wisdom to know when things in your life are out of sync; and all these qualities in balance culminates in feeling confident and beautiful; and then abundance flows toward you.

Try a little experiment during the coming week or two. I learned this from Suze Orman a few years ago while seeing her on PBS. Clean out clutter! The theory is when clutter is cleaned away the door opens for abundant energy to flow into your life. That worked for me the first time I tried it. After her show that night, I looked under my couch cushions and much to my surprise I found a dollar bill and some change. Then I went into my master bath and cleaned out cupboards and drawers. You know . . . those bottles of various products with a dab left in them. By the time I finished I had a full trash bag of junk! Then I cleaned out my closet. About that same time, I put into effect some Feng Shui techniques in my home. I not only had good things come my way, but money came from unexpected sources. Not huge amounts but nonetheless, money. And besides, it made me feel good to get rid of clutter and raise my energy level. Give it a try.

I believe one of the most valuable gifts we can give our children and our grandchildren is an understanding of the importance of saving for their future, and do so while young and on a regular basis. A sense of responsibility about money learned at a young age can avoid a lot of conflict and worry as they go through life.

Linda

Author Interviews by Linda

Recently I did a long interview/discussion with best-selling author Richard S. Prather, creator of the Shell Scott Mystery series. I hoped to create an unique and informative interview with a look at Richard S. Prather’s long writing career and his life. He is now eighty-five years of age. I believe we accomplished what we set out to do. I recently posted the interview to my late husband’s website, http://www.donpendleton.com

It was in 1950 that Richard’s first Shell Scott mystery novel, The Case of the Vanishing Beauty, was published by Fawcett’s Gold Medal Paperback Originals. His successful and best-selling Shell Scott series of thirty-six novels plus four short story collections, published between 1950 and 1987, have sold over 40 million copies in the United States and have enjoyed foreign language publication, selling millions more world-wide. In addition to the Shell Scott mysteries, Richard penned three novels under pseudonyms. He wrote the first Dragnet novel based on the television show, Dragnet titled, Dragnet: Case No. 561, published under the name, David Knight; used that same pseudonym for the initial publication of Pattern for Murder, later republished by Gold Medal Books as The Scrambled Yeggs by Richard S. Prather; and used the pen name Douglas Ring for The Peddler, which was later republished under his own name by Gold Medal. He also published a number of short stories; and lent his name to the Shell Scott Mystery Magazine. The Peddler, a non-Shell Scott book, is now back in print, released by Hard Case Crime in November, 2006.

I enjoy doing interviews with authors. On the sidebar, Author Interviews by Linda Pendleton, in addition to the Prather interview, you will find links to two other interviews I’ve done with friends. Athena Demetrois, medium and trance-channel for the spirt guide, James Martin Peebles, Dr. Peebles being the subject of two of my nonfiction books. Athena hopes to soon publish her book on her journey of healing and spiritual growth. Her life story is an important one as she suffered sexual abuse as a very young child, and in her search for God she had a spiritual awaking and found healing. The other interview is with E. Nora Amrani, metaphysician, and author of American Indian Women Poets: Women Between Worlds.

I have also added links on the sidebar to two of my slide show meditations. Soul Reflections features my original nature photos, famous quotations, and beautiful instrumental music by Carey Landry. The second, Forgiveness Meditation also features a beautiful song by Carey Landry. If you need a few minutes to escape from the chaos of the day, I believe you will find the meditations enjoyable and relaxing.

Also on the sidebar are new links to my ECards and to my Sedona, Arizona original photographs. Please visit my free Ecards and send them to your friends and loved ones. I lived in among the beautiful red rocks of Sedona for nine years. I hope you enjoy viewing the beauty of nature.

Linda

So Cal Nancy

My first blog! This should be great fun. North Sister-South Sister, as you may already know, means my sister & I live in opposite parts of California. We also sometimes have opposing views, likes and dislikes. Amazing to have grown up together in southern California during the late 40’s, the 50’s and early 60’s, only 2 years apart and to have developed into two diverse & unique women. I continue to live within 5 miles of where I was born even though I always thought the East Coast was where I belonged. As a wee tike I spoke as a native New Yorker or Bostonian. Maybe a past life? When I visited New England in 1985, I felt like I had come home. I still plan to return there but watching the weather daily in Bar Harbor, Maine, I don’t think I’m a person who would be happy with 7 months of winter.

Having stayed in this area means I have seen enormous growth, change (not all for the better), congestion and influx of so many cultures. One major change is that people have become so rude. Not on a one-to-one basis, but when they are in a group or out in public it seems nobody wants to be accountable for their actions. In the drive thru lane at Starbucks every once in awhile there is a car ahead of me with a driver who is not paying attention to their surroundings and refuse to move up in the lane in a timely fashion. The problem with that is the traffic which is trying to turn in off the street ends up blocking the cars that are trying to get where they’re going. It seems everyone has their iPod or phone in their ear and is in their own little universe. Then there is the person who gets their drink at the pick up window and promptly wads up their receipt and drops it on the ground. Even though there is a trash can past the window for just that purpose.

Who do people think is going to come behind them and pick up their mess? It’s left for all of us to see blowing around on our streets and sitting on and under the shrubs along the roadway. Last week end as I was driving home from my son’s house, in the middle of the street just west of the left turn signal I saw a half full gallon of milk sitting on the pavement. What??? Who would have done that? You have to wonder if it was still cold, or all clumped together and smelly. Would the street sweeper pick that up in the middle of the road like that? The problem with crowded southern California is that there are so many of these instances that it just becomes part of our landscape. And what is familiar, that you see everyday, becomes acceptable.

Nancy February 6, 2007